Here in Southern California, it’s not as unusual to hear about a woman being ordered to pay alimony (spousal support) as it is in many other parts of the country. For example, someone who has gained success in the entertainment industry may far outearn her husband (or wife), even if that spouse is successful in their own field.
Women in all kinds of industries, however, sometimes far outearn their spouses. That can and should be considered if the couple divorces and the lesser-earning spouse won’t be able to comfortably support themselves on their own.
The law vs. real life
Nothing in the law mandates that only men can be ordered to pay alimony. However, that doesn’t mean there isn’t still sometimes a stigma around it that prevents some men from seeking support – and even, sometimes, keeps judges from granting it.
One former American Bar Association official says that “men receiving support is still the exception rather than the rule.” An official with the Association of Matrimonial Lawyers notes that judges still generally award less alimony and for shorter periods to men than to women. Further, they often require more evidence that men receiving alimony are doing everything possible to reach their earning potential.
The same factors should be considered regardless of gender
If you’re a man who plans to seek alimony, it’s crucial to know that the same factors should be considered as for a woman. For example, if you left the workforce or put your career on the back burner to be a stay-at-home parent, that needs to be considered.
Other factors, like the length of the marriage and the marital standard of living, should also be considered. After a lengthy marriage, alimony can be used to help even out spouses’ post-divorce standard of living. In a community property state like California, that can be especially important.
It’s crucial for men seeking alimony in divorce to know the law and their rights – and to fight for what they believe is fair, regardless of the opinions of others not involved in the divorce. Having experienced legal guidance is crucial to making a solid case.