Transitioning from being a couple to co-parents can be challenging. As a result, it’s important to take some time to “get ready” for a new phase of your relationship with your child’s other parent. Generally speaking, if you and your child’s other parent are going your separate ways, preparing for this new chapter will likely involve setting boundaries, managing expectations and prioritizing your child’s needs over past conflicts.
Every co-parenting relationship is unique. As long as you’re trying to approach things in a healthy way, exercising self-respect and respect for your co-parent as an adult who is important to your child, keeping your child’s best interests at heart and trying to move forward with grace and dignity, you can’t really go too wrong.
Establishing a clear parenting plan
A well-structured parenting plan can also help you to cultivate a relatively smooth co-parenting relationship. This legal document can outline your custody arrangements, parenting time schedules, holiday plans and decision-making responsibilities, for starters. You can codify almost anything in your parenting plan that you need to be enforceable by the courts.
Having clear guidelines can help to reduce the risk of misunderstandings and provide greater stability for your child. A strong parenting plan might also include provisions for handling conflicts, communicating about important issues and making adjustments as the child’s needs change. If an issue seems like one that could potentially trip you and your co-parent up in the future, it is generally best to address it proactively.
Preparing for life as a co-parent takes effort. Of this, there is no doubt. And the fact that you can only control your side of the equation can be tough. But if you have a clear mind, act with intention, set respectful expectations and keep your eye on what you want for you and your child, you’ll place yourself in the strongest possible position to succeed.