You are contemplating separating or getting divorced from your spouse. As part of that process, you need to discuss or break the news to various people in your life. In today’s post and multiple posts that will follow, we’re going to provide insights about how to have these delicate conversations with the important people in your life.
Today, let’s talk about how to discuss the news with your parents.
Obviously, the conversation (or conversations) you will have will depend on factors such as:
- Your level of closeness with your parents;
- Whether your parents are still alive or together (or not);
- What relationship your parents have with your spouse;
- Whether or not you have any children with your spouse (i.e. grandchildren for your parents);
- Your level of commitment to separating or getting divorced;
- Your beliefs about how your parents will react to the news;
- And so forth.
Before you have the conversation, sit down and think about how you would like the conversation to go. You might want to avoid certain topics. For instance, maybe your mother is prone to criticizing you, and you want to avoid having to deal with her criticism, while you’re trying to process what’s happened to your marriage. Or perhaps you only want to tell your parents “so much” about the reasons. Perhaps you or your spouse committed infidelity, for instance, and you want to keep that information private. Take some time before you have the conversation to clarify your needs, goals, and concerns – don’t make up the rules “on the fly.”
Lastly, don’t be afraid to ask for support, if your parents can provide such support, including financial help (if you need to get back on your feet), emotional support, and even help finding legal representation or connecting with a financial planner or therapist. Now is the time to access support, so that you can move on with your life. Call the team here at Dinnebier & Demmerle to set up a consultation with our California divorce lawyers.